Monday, November 18, 2013

Skunks in the Vieja

"Hey Hannah, have you seen Mike?"
"He went running down the street after a skunk that he thought was a cat and now we can't find him."

This is one of my favorite conversations that I have ever had with anyone, and it describes my old living situation better then anything I could ever come up with. The last year and a half of my college career, the house I lived in was ridiculous. It was this really old, rundown house in a neighborhood right off campus called La Plaza Vieja, but we all called it the Vieja. The house opened up into an alleyway, which only added to its ghetto charm. No joke, one part of the directions to my house was "OK, then there's going to be a dumpster on the left side of the road. Turn left into the alley right past it." Hahaha To make it even better, I lived in the house with FOUR BOYS. Yeah, ridiculous is a little bit of an understatement, because they were all out of their goddamn minds. Our neighbors were equally as batshit as we were, which lead to moments like the one above (Mike was very drunk when he went running after the skunk cat). Some of my other favorite Vieja memories:

- The time my roommates brought over a bunch of freshmen and I got really drunk in my kitchen and was mean to them.

- Waking up after getting crazy the night before, and all of us sitting on the porch drinking coffee/tea reevaluating all of our life choices. This happened so much.

- That time Mike gave me a striptease to the lollipop song from "The Wizard of Oz" at like 9 in the morning, and Jordan laughing so hard he puked.

- The pep talk the boys gave me when I came home crying after an International Economics study session convinced I was going to fail college. ("Hannah I know you don't like coffee or whiskey, but I'm going to make you a drink and you're going to drink it and like it.)

- The night after graduation when they all took me out and we got so ridiculous that we got kicked out of Mia's, which I didn't even know was possible, because its the most hipster bar in existence.

- The Annual Plaza Vieja Beerster Egg Hunt. We would decorate beer cans to look like easter eggs and hide them around our yard, the neighbor's yard, and the neighbor's house. There were also various mixed drinks hidden, and it was always really nasty shit like vodka and milk.

- Mike and I in our pretty easter dresses.

- Watching "Friday Night Lights" on Netflix and everyone making fun of me for it, then coming home the next day to find out they had become obsessed with it and watched the entire series in a day.

- Jordan getting kicked out of Ladies 80's and Electric Kingdom every single time we went.

- The bonfires at Cutter and Jordan's house before Jordan moved in with us.

- The fort that we had in the living room for almost two months, until I got really really angry one day and tore it down.

- Stupid Rob sleeping on our couch all the time over the summer, then getting really angry and offended when I asked him if he was homeless. Hahahaha

- That time I came home from work and all the boys were out in the alley by the fence puking their brains out and laughing their asses off at the same time.

- Always getting butterflies in my stomach when I saw Cutter's car in the driveway, because he was so so so hot. And I always looked so so so terrible.

- Drunk Mike. Describing all the reasons Drunk Mike was my favorite would take way too much time.

- That time we all went out, then I had to be at work at 5:30 am and I woke up with my eye swollen shut. I came home from work with my eye still fucked up, Jordan and Mike sitting on the porch really confused and hungover telling me to be careful because there was a strange dog locked in Stu's room.

- All the parties at stoked guy's house.

- Stoked guy telling the whale joke.

- Brandon breaking the hammock.

- Brandon being so sensitive, but all of us loving him because he always cooked for us.

- That time Diego and Jordan ate all of my leftovers, then took me out to dinner to make up for it and were perfect gentlemen. Then we came home and an hour later they were shitfaced on whiskey.

There are so many more, but its almost 1 am here, so I think I'm going to call it quits on this adventure down memory lane. God damn, that house was so much fun.


  1. This is awesome. I totally thought Mike was a dog hahaha

  2. Hahahahaha that makes it so much better.